I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what came first the chicken or the chips

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A mailman walks into a bar He delivers a bill for the electricity and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walked into a bar Ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the deal with airline food... It has to be packaged and prepared in such a way large quantities of people can eat the meal with minimal preparation, which results in lower quality. If you don't like it, order a drink from the cart.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

lipstick pig

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Are you going to just stand there and watch me burn for i am on fire? Well that is fine because the sensation feels so fantastic. You are going to just stand there and listen to me whine the night away. It is quite okie-dokie for I really love your art of lying! To be certain, I love it very much! I can not find myself telling you what really occurred, I can only explain to you the sensation i felt from this moment. For I have a dagger in my trachea. For the number of days where the do not's fell like the actually do's. I will be very happy :). But where are you trying to walk away from. Than she told me she was leaving. I said no you very certainly are not! Megan Lady-who-sleeps-with-many-men (aka Whore) Fox. We find ourselves back on the day we met...... etc etc, lot's of pissed off Rapper vs. the English language. Than more words fly out of the mouth of the woman that said she "just wanted a hit" than got slapped around the ear by her ex. It is a pointless song. Today's youth is hopeless. (just kidding i love Eminem stay infinite for life)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do Mexicans have sex? They get in bed, and the man puts his dick in his partner's vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Wanna hear a joke? women's rights. jaye clenton is a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I love you! Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Squirrels are rabbid Yes mi this is a haiku!!!! I know ur reading this so grape grape grape

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man sees a watch that he want. He then purchases it with his hard earned money.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops