whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

A: Knock Knock B: ...

Burp

Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

Q. why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? A. it said concentrate.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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