Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the clam say to the scuba diver? FUCK MAN! STOP TOUCHING MY JEWELS! WOULD YOU WANT ME TO JUST RIP YOURS AND TAKE THEM WITH ME!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

mental kid

thumb_up thumb_down -11

1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT TRUCK! What truck? Weird I could have sworn I saw a truck...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except that didn't work for the boy. He also lost his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops