Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

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there is 500 dicks on the wall how many will choke on? None?? so ur a professional!!!! lol

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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69

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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hi mom

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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A young woman goes to a wild, infamous nightclub, all alone. She arrives safely at home a few hours later.

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A typical out-door activity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops