What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

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what is big, black, and has hair on it. a big black guy with hair.

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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if your paddling a backwards canoe up a waterfall and it loses its wheel, how many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house? the answer is 17 because aliens are allgeric to cows and mustard.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

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why did the boy fall off his bicycle? because his dad threw a refrigerator at him.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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If 6 is afraid of 7, what is 7 afraid of? ...Chuck Norris.

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A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

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Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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