What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

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Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

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why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

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Why did the racecar driver lose his driver's license? He crashed into an orphanage.

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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knock knock who's there the german police now pack your stuff and get out

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

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The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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