I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

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hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha hahahanahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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the holocaust

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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Yo mammas so stupid she has a profound intellectual disability.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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anal seepage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops