What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Wanna hear a joke? women's rights. jaye clenton is a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Pakistani news reader.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man with a hammer in his head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Nick Cannon

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops