Q:what word starts with "p" and ends with "orn"? A: popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

i find your gravy quite lumpy.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happens after you go to school? (you tell me, i'm only in 6th grade)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Today is March 22.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did i come to this site i was doing a school easy about the anti-apartheid movement

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -24

If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a trash can? -Finding a dead baby in 5 trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops