How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

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Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops