What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

What's a good joke? Not this one.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

When life gives you oranges, hit kidswith 'em.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

What do you call white trash Garbage

Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...