Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

69

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

People...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do u call a banana? A banana......

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -14

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Peter

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how do you get your son or daughters attention? break down the door to their room and promptly begin beating them with a wooden baseball and then tie them up to a chair and torture them for 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black man riding a plane? A black man riding a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Internet Explorer

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops