Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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why are marcos hands all swetty. he just got done giving a hand job to joe.

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What's black and sits in the back of a police car? The seat.

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

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Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

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Q: What happens when you sit in the middle of the road? A: You get hit by a car and die a horrible death as your family members mourn in the loss and remain sad forever.

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John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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