What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Why do some women insist they don't have penises or testicles? All humans have penises and testicles! A: These women have been brainwashed by feminism. It's quite sad, really.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the 18 year old white male late for his college class. On his way to college he got in a car accident and killed 5 people and he walked away unharmed

thumb_up thumb_down -23

25

thumb_up thumb_down -23

if 5+5=10 then 7+9=52

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the zombie eat for breakfast? You. You fell a-sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -23

H o m o comes out as homo

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Daym im romantic

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops