Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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