Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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punchline below punchline above

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Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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69 is a number not a sex poshion

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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