What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Black guys shoot. White guys have small penises. Black guys steal. White guys have keep money. Black guys are broke. That's what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

thumb_up thumb_down -19

An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than having sex with a woman who has been dead for 10 minutes? Having sex with a woman who has been alive for 10 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down -21

It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Just found out that it doesn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops