A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

Knock, Knock. Come in!

Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

Q: What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A: A pilot, you racist.

You and your parents are going to die today

How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

whats worse than a kane nothing

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice.

Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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