A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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This is an anti-anti-joke.

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Why id the Jew keep putting his name at the end of anti jokes? He was an attention seeking big nosed virgin kunt

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when life givs you lemons, make lesbian porn

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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