why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Nickelback

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

Harry Chappell raped someone

why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

hello juliano and guss. having fun?

Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

I had friends on the Death Star.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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