What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

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What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

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What's up with women with there jewlery it's there's best friend,but a black man's best friend is reames..

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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Dan walked into a jelly fish

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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What do you call a man with no arms? A: A Man with no arms.

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What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

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Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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If it bothers you? I am just saying that, fucking alright ill be slightly less cruel, I mean come on! It does not matter shit what others think! If someone ever tries to assault you because you are associated with me (yeah it happens), I will stand in front of you and KILL (and possibly rape) THEM!

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Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops