Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Lil' Johnny was happily swinging on the swings when all of a sudden...... ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> FLYING DAGGERS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

thumb_up thumb_down +13

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops