What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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God

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What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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What's 9+ 10?! 19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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