What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

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Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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What did the Russian scientist say to the British scientist when he saw two black guys enter a strip club? "Two black guys entered the strip club"

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

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So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue...........Im wearing socks

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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