I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

balls

What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

What did the hungry man do? He ate.

Fart

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

Because she has down's syndrome

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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