A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman when he wanted her to leave? A: please leave

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What's funny about the holocaust? Nothing. Whoever thinks the holocaust is funny is a dick.

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Poop

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Why don't chicken wear underwear? Because their peckers are on their face

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A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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s e m e n

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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