What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

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A scotsmen, an Irishman and an Englishman all walk into a bar. The publican had accidentally left the door unlocked and the bar was in fact closed. So they left.

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Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

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What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

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*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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Gangnam style

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Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

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Moralman... Seriously man, take it easy, my name is Nero, yes I play dual identities sometimes, it is only in order to convey my hidden messages to my people. I am deeply sorry to admit that those that assaulted you where indeed from my order, they have been prosecuted by the law and excluded from our order.

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once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

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brandon ya twwat

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Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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They should introduce a filtering system on here. That way any repeated jokes, or idiots taking up a page with a copy and paste routine, could be simply erased by those who are bored with them or find them irritating. [L]

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

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If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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