What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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whats brown and sticky? shit

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69

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

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Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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leon harney ya pikey

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What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

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An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm not a? poet microwave

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

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GONNA

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what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

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why are tree's green cause that's how god made it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops