Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guys ducked.

What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

hahahahaha thats not funny

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

I would rape her

how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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