Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

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How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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Q: wanna hear a racist joke? A: sure RB: You're pathetic!

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A man comes home to find his wife in bed with another man. He then joins them.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? she got a fridge thrown at her

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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yo mama so fat she decided to go on a diet :)

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Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops