- Anti Joke

Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

In the land of cheerios, there are three social classes. The bottom class consists of the regular cheerios, the middle class consists of the honey nut cheerios, and the top class consists of the frosted cheerios. One day, Mr. Cheerio was disappointed with his life in the bottom social class. He thought to himself, "Gosh, I bet life would be much better if I were a honey nut cheerio!" So he goes to the mighty cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must i do for thee that thou might make me a honey nut cheerio?" The great cheerio king then says to him "I shall make thee a honey nut cheerio if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of vegetables!". Mr. Cheerio accepts the quest and travels for many months and years through all of the neighboring lands and finally collects the vegetables. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the bargain my making him a honey nut cheerio. Mr. Cheerio is very happy with his new life. Due to his higher rank in society, he is able to find a wonderful job, marry a wonderful woman and have a few wonderful kids. One day, Mr. Cheerio thinks to himself, "I wonder what my life would be like if my family and I were all frosted cheerios. I could provide more for my family, and we would have a much fancier way of life!". He returns to the cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must I do for thee that thou might make my family and I frosted cheerios?". The king then states "I will make thee frosted cheerios if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of fruits." Mr. Cheerio accepts this new quest. He departs from his family and travels for many months and years through all the neighboring lands until he finds all the fruits he needs. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the deal by making Mr. Cheerio's family frosted cheerios. The life of the frosted cheerios is incredible. It is everything that the Cheerio family could have ever wanted. There are new opportunities around every corner. One day, a friend of Mr. Cheerio invites him to a dinner party that all of the frosted cheerios will be attending. Mr. Cheerio and his wife are talking to their friends at the party, when Mrs. Cheerio says to Mr. Cheerio, "Hey, honey, I'm getting a little thirsty. Could you go get me some punch?". Mr. Cheerio finds a very long line and stands in it. Once he gets to the front, however, he discovers that it is the line for steak, not punch. He repeats this process with half a dozen other lines, but he cannot find the line for punch. He returns to his wife and says, "Honey, there's something wrong with this joke. There's no punch line."

Whats black, white, and red all over? A severely beaten and bruised man who was found un conscience and robbed in a dark parking lot behind Dennys at 2 o'clock in the morning.

What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

What's 1+1? 69.

Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

Whats numbing and smells like burning toast? A stroke.

a man is running away

Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

Why did the blonde put tip-ex on the computer screen? To spite her physically abusive husband

If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Wheres my tractor?

An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

your mom is so old, she is often confused for your grandmother.

Health food.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

The hooker walks into a bar wearing a vest and tight denim shorts. A drunken man proceeds in trying to have his way with her. He is thrown out for sexual mis-conduct and is currently waiting for his court date.

What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he'd would like to make a wager. The bartender replies, "no."

Roses are red Violets are buckets This poem makes no sense Boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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