A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

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Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

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Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

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whats black white and read all over a zebra bleeding to death because a zombie just attacked it and then it attackeed the zombie

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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An oriental man starts a new job. He is told to go to the Supply cupboard and bring back some stationery.He is gone far too long so his boss sends another man to see what is going on. The oriental man had a fatal stroke in the supply cupboard and was unfortunately dead.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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