A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench. A bench is wooden while a black guy has a human body composed of mostly water.

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How do you stop a bus You throw a fridge at it

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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A black guy walks into a KKK meeting. He is burnt on a cross outside his families house. They will mourn his death for years to come

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

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What do you call a donkey that can't speak? Whatever you want to call it...I prefer to call it a donkey that can't speak!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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