Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

Why did the chicken cross the rode? It was being chased by a fox and did not want to be eaten.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

Meow.

Why did the fish swim away from the boat when the fishermen put him back in the water? Because he obviously wasn't gonna get back in the boat.

charlie sheen losing

In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy running down a hill? Two good friends enjoying the countryside together.

i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

How do you spell eight? 8

What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

What's worrying about a middle-eastern man on a plane? The fact you are worrying about it.

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

you

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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