Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

haha. i got blocked too!!!!

Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory

Dislike this.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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