Q: What did Cyclops say to Wolverine? A: "We're both X-Men!"

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What did Bush say to Obama was elected? I'm going to have you assassinated.

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why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

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Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

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i used to be gay. now i am bisexual.

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whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

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When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? An Xbox 360.

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

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Hi

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There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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LIFE :(

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A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

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Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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Why really answer a question when you can just respond, "because you touch yourself." For example, Q: Why did fluffy die? A: Because you touch yourself.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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