A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops