Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

Why'd the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one.

What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

A Muslim boards a plane and he sits done quietly and politely just like everyone else, the plan lands safely at its destination.

Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

Find the M: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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