Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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