Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops