Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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