So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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