Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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