what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Women.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's funnier than 24? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

thumb_up thumb_down +2

12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops