I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

thumb_up thumb_down -25

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops