How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

5 Italian guys from Long Island

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

here's a joke... the american education society

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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