Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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woman's rights

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

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so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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