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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

What's hanging by a rope from the tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

In my opinion I am superior to you all in every single way,an opinion you might disagree with, but can respect. While on the other hand, I have no reason to respect and even less agree with your inferior opinions at all.

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

Did you hear the one about the black guy that went to college? Me niether

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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