Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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women drivers>asian drivers>asian women drivers

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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