What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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can you touch your toes? no

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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