- Anti Joke

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

Why did the man go to Cantabria, Spain? Because he liked potatoes... jk

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.