Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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no

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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