If Billy has 4 apples in his left hand and 6 apples in his right hand, what does he have? Very large hands.

what smells like tuna? my underwear

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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